Interestingly enough, I came to the conclusion some time ago, that hating someone really did me no good. That FIRE that was fueling within me was felt by me and me only. I was the one having trouble sleeping at night. I was the one who thought about how "I was wronged" all day, not them and 9 times out of 10... they had no idea how I even felt! I heard something today that rang true about this, I happened to catch a clip of Ghost of Mississippi. I didn't see the whole film, but one of the characters (Whoopi Goldberg) said something that rang true and made me remember to put out that fire, "When you hate, the only person that suffers is you. Most people don't know you hate them and the others don't care." I mean, how true is that?
Why do we keep a "torch" lit for these people who are so obviously not worthy of us? I don't say that in the sense that we are inherently better than each other, but that when someone wrongs us, we determine how we deal with it, not them. As we grow and continue to learn, we realize that we must get ahold of our emotions, deal with our problems without involving others and not causing ourselves undue heartbreak. It is a hard lesson because we are all only human, it's something I strive for everyday but find that the embers within me continue to spark....
That line you take from Mississippi Burning is such a good one. If you are the one most hurt by your hatred, then who benefits most from your forgiveness?
ReplyDeleteBut what is hatred but anger amplified. I hate you because you have offended me; perhaps you have physically hurt me; perhaps you are a symbol of that which oppresses me. But our darker side can be our greater teacher. From our envy, anger, hatred, laziness, whatever, we are able to see sides of ourselves that no one could show us. I have found what sets me off, more times than not, is something I dislike in myself on which I cannot get a handle. To let go of my anger towards someone else is to cut myself a break. In as far as I am willing to be patient with myself and my own imperfections and shortcomings I am able to extend that patience / forgiveness to someone else.